There are so many things I could write about this week.
The sad tragedy that took place just over a week ago where 16 members of the Humbolt Bronco’s Junior Team lost their lives in the tragic bus accident including the teams coaches, announcer, trainer and 12 of the players with the remaining 17 survivors with the emotional as well as physical scars to deal with.
The tragedy is something I can relate to all too well, when I was 8 years old I will never forget when my Dad’s best friends came to our door and shared the news that he passed away as a result of a tragic accident and how my Mother, my greatest fan, screamed at the top of her lungs NO!
No parent should ever have to bury their child, and for Humbolt, Saskatchewan, Canada and the world, this tragedy will impact all those involved not just in the hockey community, but in sports. One of the positives that has come out of the tragedy is how the world has shared their support for those impacted, the story that struck me most was kids in Uganda wearing sweaters in thanks to the Junior Teams charity donations and support in this CBC article
I could write about the Sedins, whose illustrious careers as the two best players to cycle the puck EVER in the game has come to an end and I suspect will be first ballots for the NHL HOF as well as # 22 / #33 jerseys hung in the stages of Rogers Arena sooner than later.
I could even tie in how the Sedins themselves were multi-sport athletes to promote the benefits of multi-sport participation for further insight on the article Fear, greed, broken dreams: Why Early Sport Specialization is Eroding Youth Sports that I contributed to literally went viral and was shared across Canada, US, parts of Europe and Australia.
There are several other subjects I could cover, but I thought this week I would share insight that I will be adding yet another sport to my coaching resume, my son and several of his friends have signed up for ball hockey, Just as he has with all of his other sports he said to me earlier this week “Dad, J’s Dad is really struggling with the team, I have had several players come to me and ask “will your dad coach”? Ironically, as he has played so many sports and has done some coaching, I suspect he could do so.
Translation – Dad, would you help coach my team?
He is now 19 years old, finished his first year of university, and although he has had his fair share of coaches that thought nothing of depriving him and many of his teammates the opportunity to contribute to games, screamed at the top of their lungs when they made mistakes in games and practices, even threw sticks or other items in frustration, he still has the aspiration to try different sports and be active.
My youth sports coaching journey has literally come full circle. 17 years ago I stepped up to coach my daughter in softball, a couple of years later my son in hockey and as it was the first few years for both of them before they entered the competitive streams, he now is playing for the same reasons when he started, to have fun, play with his friends, and just get exercise.
I told him that I will reach out to his coach and ask him if he would like help, and when I did so he was really appreciative I had did so. He further confessed he really did not know much about coaching, but put up his hand because no one else did as he did not want the kids not to be able to play. This is the same selfless reason many coaches step up and every time I interact with volunteer coaches I share my sincere appreciation for them doing so.
His Dad, who is the head coach of the team, said to me the following when we talked;
- I just want the boys to have fun
- I just want them to be active
- I am not worried about wins or losses and
- It is their team, I am just there so they can PLAY
It was like I was listening to myself in the mirror as they are all the same primary reasons for me but sadly in this day and age where the focus of youth sports has evolved to a winning at all costs environment, parents hoping for a return on investment aspiring for their kids to play collegiately or professionally, it was refreshing to hear there are others that have the same philosophy as I.
He further shared that there are parents and coaches that think their kids are playing for the Stanley Cup, when we both agreed that ball hockey is literally Pond Hockey on concrete as we play on the rinks when the ice is melted. Thanks to ball hockey evolving as an organized sport, I am starting to see more and more kids play street hockey again without adults, refs, forming their own teams, enforcing their own rules, improvising nets with stones, cones, sticks, gloves or what have you.
He then stated I only needed to do two things to be able to help out;
- I had to have Respect in Sport and
- I had to get a Criminal Record (Police) Check done
To which I said, no problem I completed RIS for Hockey and no issues with the CRC.
I then reached out to the Risk Manager for Ball Hockey to get the letter I would need to provide for the police check and although I had taken the RIS course that was grandfathered as a one-time certification, he recommended I complete the new version as it was being updated regularly and new coaches had to renew every 5 years.
He provided me the coupon code to waive the fee and I then sat down in front of my computer to take the online course and was amazed at how much had been added to it, in addition to talking about various forms of harassment, it has modules on LTAD, Physical Literacy, medical, Physical Wellness, Psychological Wellness, Mental Health.
I was so happy to see that much of what I have been “preaching” in clinics, workshops, breakouts and keynote presentations was being offered in the RIS module. It also had been changed from RIS for coaches, to RIS for activity leaders to cover all those that are involved in physical activity leadership like camps, schools, coaching.
Kudo’s to Sheldon Kennedy and all those that the Respect Group for continuing to create the awareness of all the various issues that impacted youth sports so that the volunteer coaches would be better prepared.
I then did some digging on our associations website and came across the Canadian Ball Hockey Association Coaches Manual, a 70-page document that covers philosophy, characteristics, duties, Legal Liability and then IT’S ALL ABOUT THE KIDS
In that section, they cover the reasons why kids play, what parents expect of coaches and then the following section is
FAIR PLAY
It covers the principals of fair play, playing time, discipline, coaches and parent connecting, and contracts for coaches, parents, officials
Many of which I have come across in more depth for hockey, but I must confess I was impressed that Ball Hockey has gone to the extent they have to provide volunteer coaches, many of which with NO experience, the tools so they could do so.
What I was particularly impressed with, as they put in their manual the term that I have been saying to everyone that I interact with regardless if speaking at a conference, running workshops or clinics, interacting with board members, executive members, parents or the players themselves.
IT’S ALL ABOUT THE KIDS.
This is truly what it is all about, but sadly we have a lot of work to do so that the adults stop competing with other adults thru their kids and we bring the game (yes the game) back to the kid’s where it belongs.
This afternoon I will be on the bench with the boys and other coaches in the very same rink that I coached Ice Hockey for years, this time I will be doing so with more insight thanks to the all the research, interaction, travel, speaking, mentoring and so forth I had.
The motivation for me doing so has not changed, I will be doing so to make a difference by developing youth into adults. Some of the players, like my son, are now adults.
But when I shared with him that I had been asked to help, mentor the head coach he started laughing. When I told him that I had coached for so many years now I had to renew my Respect in Sport he laughed even harder.
It was when I shared with him, “It’s all about the kids” and he said to me, DAD, I sent you the schedule on Google Calendar for the First 4 games, tomorrow, Sunday, Tues and Wed. and then I get on a plane to speak at a conference Thur-Sunday.
Hang on a sec? I thought you said would only be one game per week?
I said to myself, Relax, “It’s all about the kids”
He then shared the best two words any parent can hear as he did so with a HUGE Smile on his face (sadly his smile went away for many years when sports became way too serious)
“THANKS DAD” and then he ran off to reach out to all his buds that I was going to help coach with a smile on his face as he did so.
That’s why I coach, like many other volunteer coaches, the Dad who stepped up to do so was very appreciative of getting help, I coach for my son and all the rest of his buds to just PLAY. To help them love a sport more at the end of a season than the start, to encourage them to be active for life.
This will be a swan song of sorts though, it will be the last time that I will coach “the boys”, all of which have developed into great young men, and when the season ends in just 2 months and we all walk out of the dressing room after the last game will be a sad day for me just as it is for every parent to watch their kids leave the dressing room for the last time. Just as I had about 5 years back when I walked off the field with my daughter to the car after her last softball season.
Until that day happens, I will do what I love most, make a difference by developing the boys into adults, mentor the coach, engage the parents and be appreciative that this group of boys are not ones that quit all sports before high school.
Most importantly, that each time they come to the rink, they go out there, have fun, and see what happens.
Let’s all work together to bring the game back to the kids … where it belongs.
